Today's entry is the 1000th post in Cards on Cards history. Since your faithful blogger forgot to set his alarm this morning and fire up the ol' bloggerspotter, this momentous occasion will be commemorated in the most fantastical way possible - it's a guest post!
Larry Mudlin here. I have been collecting sporting cards for about 20 years now! When I first happened upon this webbed site that you know as "Cards on Cards", it took me approximately 67 WITTY of the wittiest comments before Kerry finally approved my genius words of wisdom for public display. (And that's crazy-bonkers, right? I mean, he doesn't even MODERATE his comments!)
Since Kerry is far far too busy snorting his coked canes to ever do so much as put together a proper Frequently Answered Questions document (that's an F-A-Q to your n00bers), I thought I'd take the liberty of being super duper helpful rather than just show off his latest batch of J.D. Drew jerseyed cards.
Question #1: What is the best based ball card that has ever graced the blogged pages of "Cards on Cards"?
Well, guys, this is an easy one. It might not be a card, technically, but the answer is Darrell Porter. Darrell Porter! Always. Please send me all your Portered cards! That glorious day upon days when Kerry graced this very blog with his 1981 Topps Sticker sent my based ball loving heart a-fluttering and I went and posted 37 reddits about it.
That's an easy one, folkaroos! I would be redditing my little heart out, of course! I also spend a lot of time on my Twittered account. My "handle" is "LarryAwesomeNES", because I just can't HANDLE how AWESOME the Nintendo Entertainment System (NES to you lame-mans) is! And me, Larry, of course. I'm awesome.
Question #3: If your house was on fire, what based ball cards would you grab and why?
Question #4: What's the most rewarding part of being a based ball card blogger?
All of the amazing promotional opportunities that come the way of the blogger! Obviously. And the piles of cash and fame. Did you know that Kerry sleeps on stacks of $2 bills and uses sewn together bootlegged Mark McGwire Olympic rookie cards as bed sheets? Did you know that he has a jersey made of jersey pieces of Ryan Freaking Ludwick? Did you know that he has TEN UNIQUE DARRELL PORTER CARDS? Eeeeeeeeee. I need to go on the tweeter page about this.
Question #5: What is the worst part of being a based ball card blogger?
Intense media pressure. And your mom won't stop yelling at you to take the garbage out. MOM, it's JUST garbage. It's going to decompose on its own no matter where you put it, amirite?
Question #6: Do you have any hot tips for the n00bers... ahem... new guys out there?
Go for the big hit and then blogger about it! It's a crazy world out there, but who needs rent money when you have sick Tristar autos?
Well guys, it's been a fantastical blast, but I hear Kerry is having a "come down" from his illicit drugular activities.
This has been Larry...
...SIGNING OFF!
So, When did you start Potting Bloggers? Do you use fertilizer or special soil? How often do you water them? How long before they start to sprout and grow?
ReplyDeleteI just peed my pants. Literally, like 10 minutes before I read this post, I was in the lake and I peed in my swimsuit.
ReplyDeleteFunny.