Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #593

The Radness is coming! The Radness is coming! Watch this space over the weekend for details on that free contest thing that I do every year around this time. Perhaps there will even be a post about baseball cards, if we're all lucky.

Bob Tewksbury was a crafty right-handed pitcher who won 110 games in his career. His best years were his years spent as a Cardinal, which is why it's only slightly forgivable that I posted a picture of a Cubs card here on the blog. He was an All-Star in 1992 as a Redbird, where he went 16-5 in 32 starts with a 2.16 ERA.

Why did Topps airbrush Bob's photo? Tewksbury was a Yankee who hadn't fully realized his promise when he was dealt, midseason, to the Cubs in a trade that involved Steve Trout donning the pinstripes. It didn't work out so well for either side. I can offer no explanation as to why Topps couldn't get him in a Cubs jersey with 7 appearances and 3 starts to choose from. Lazy Topps is lazy.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? Yeah, that logo... the vague sense of disconnect with reality. Tewksbury is probably lost in thought over his steep fall from his Donruss The Rookies days. Wait, is that two weeks in a row that I've posted a Cubs card? What is wrong with me?

If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.

Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #68

Could it possibly be that I am actually running out of '80s subjects for Airbrushed Fridays? Unless I happen to find another one in the next couple of weeks, this may be it for awhile. If you know of any '80s duds that I haven't already featured here, please feel free to drop me a line.

Dave Dravecky was a hard-luck starting pitcher who spent most of his career with San Diego. He's a cancer survivor, having developed a tumor in his pitching arm. Gruesomely, he broke the arm that had the tumor in it while pitching, and a second time while celebrating the 1989 NL pennant after joining the Giants. His arm would eventually need to be amputated. It's a rough story to say the least, but he soldiered on and became a motivational speaker after his baseball career ended.

Why did Topps airbrush Dave's photo? Topps tells you all about it on the back of the card with their "This Way to the Clubhouse" box. Still, I would have thought that three months and 18 starts would have been plenty of time to catch Dravecky in Giants gear.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? Dave has a cartoon shirt and a giant cartoon hat. Even the background looks funky.

If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.

Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #660

Is half of the '88 Topps set actually airbrushed? It's not like this set is exactly new to me, but I don't seem to remember how lousy a lot of these cards were. And here I just thought they were extremely cheap.

Rick Reuschel was a largely unheralded MLB lifer, logging 20 seasons in the bigs as #2 type starting right-hander. He was a three-time All-Star, two-time Gold Glover and won 20 games for the Cubs back in 1977. Overall, he went on to rack up more than 2000 strikeouts and held down a stylish 3.37 career ERA. Not bad, Mr. Reuschel. Had he spent more time with the Yankees and less time with, say, the Pirates and Cubs, Rick Reuschel might have one day found himself in the Hall of Fame.

Why did Topps airbrush Rick's photo? Reuschel had only started 8 games (in 9 appearances) with the Giants at the time this set was produced after he came over in a late August trade with Pittsburgh.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? The extreme close-up look of this photo unfortunately does little to hide the doctoring on his cap, particularly the all-telling intricate SF logo. Intricate cap logos are just hard to freehand, guys.

If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.

Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #322

Did you know that pitchers and catchers report in six weeks? Six weeks! It sounds like Albert Pujols contract talks are finally gaining some traction, so hopefully that will be resolved before the 11th hour. Hopefully!

Vicente Palacios was a right-handed relief pitcher and spot starter who logged innings in a variety of roles in the majors, minors and Mexican League. Baseball-Reference.com compares him to such luminaries as Ramon Monzant and George Susce.

Why did Topps airbrush Vicente's photo? Palacios was bought out of the Mexican League by the White Sox back in the mid-'80s but never worked out. He came to the Pirates organization in December of 1986 and, after being picked in the Rule V draft and subsequently returned, finally made his first Major League appearances for the Pirates during the 1987 September callups. Topps apparently wasn't interested in sending a photographer out for any of those games but was interested in creating a baseball card for him for the following season.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? His cap looks like a charcoal drawing. It's actually kind of cool looking in a way... but definitely not real.

If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.

Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #628

The response was overwhelmingly positive to the introduction of more modern gaffes on cardboard to this series, so I think I'm keeping it. I don't want to lean too far in any one direction, however, so I've settled on a fairly set schedule/rotation that's super secret and un... figure... outtable. Yep. Trust me on this one.

Dave Henderson was a steady, but fairly unremarkable outfielder for the perpetual underdog Seattle Mariners for the first half of the '80s until the Red Sox snatched him up late in the 1986 season where he became a playoff legend. After trying to give away ALCS Game 5 with a glove-assisted HR that would almost make Jose Canseco proud, Hendu - who had hit just .196 in 51 late season, mostly pinch-hit ABs with Boston in the regular season - smacked a go ahead HR in the 9th and eventually won the game for the Sox in the 11th with a sacrifice fly. I did not like the Red Sox, even then.

Why did Topps airbrush Dave's photo? Dave couldn't keep the magic going in 1987, hitting .234 as a part-time player before getting passed off to the Giants late in the season. He only had 29 plate appearances in his month-long stint for the Giants before he crossed the bay and Tony La Russa somehow turned him into an All-Star.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? Well, you could argue "nothing" here and I wouldn't necessarily disagree. I mean, look at this man. Don't you just want to give him a hug? Unfortunately, his interlocking 'SF' logo is too tally and skinny and he has weird blue "paint" on the bill of his helmet and his neck for some reason.

If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.

Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #581

It seems pretty amusing at this point that I was actually thinking I might eventually run out of airbrushed opportunities to post about. Certainly, they don't make 'em like they used to and there probably is a finite amount of these cards available to someone like me, but I think I vastly underestimated the lifespan of this weekly feature.

Tito Landrum was a reserve outfielder who spent most of his career with the St. Louis Cardinals, in two separate stints split by a partial season with the Baltimore Orioles. After the Cardinals won the 1982 World Series, Landrum became a back-to-back ring holder with Baltimore gaining the crown in 1983. He would go on to appear in his 3rd World Series with the Cards in 1985, but we won't talk about that series at this moment.

Why did Topps airbrush Tito's photo? Landrum was a midseason acquisition by the Dodgers after being released by St. Louis with a .518 OPS. (Yes, that's really, really terrible.) To his credit, Landrum made just 5 errors in 530 career games, although a lot of those games were simply pinch-hit or late inning replacement performances.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? Does this remind anyone of an Allen & Ginter "picture"? Is it just me? This is art, right?

(If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.)

Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #647

Welcome back to Cards on Cards. Here is your evening edition of Airbrushed Fridays, sponsored by nobody.

Pascual Perez was a character. A starting pitcher for the majority of his 12 year major and minor league career, Perez was known more for his on- and off-field antics than his actual game performance. Aside from one historically terrible season (1-13, 6.14 ERA for Atlanta in 1985) he had impressive big league numbers but continually bounced up and down between the majors and AAA for one reason or another. On the field, he would throw Eephus pitches and shoot opponents with imaginary finger guns, while off the field he was unfortunately plagued by drug problems.

Why did Topps airbrush Pascual's photo? I have no idea. The Expos signed him a full year before this set was released as you can see on the back of the card.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? The entire thing, aside from Pascual's face, looks like it was a chalk drawing done by an imaginative child.

(If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.)

Airbrushed Fridays: 1988 Topps #751

Reader Scott has become Blogger Scott now. Aww, look at him... he's all growed up now. Here's a card that I came across in the archives while pulling cards for him.

Jim Morrison was a singer and frontman of legendary psychedelic rock band The Doors. After quitting the band in 1971, he toiled in relative obscurity throughout the dregs of minor league baseball until he finally parlayed his skills into a part time gig as a third baseman, first with the Phillies and later on with Pennsylvania's other team.

Why did Topps airbrush Jim's photo? At the ripe old age of 45 (ignore the Topps bio stats, this must be one of those classic '80s error cards) Morrison was dealt to the Tigers for a player to be named later and Darnell Coles in the summer of 1987. There's no word if that PTBNL was someone named James Hendrix.

What's wrong with this picture, anyway? Well, first of all, the Doors singer looks funny in a ball cap. Also, the cap... it's bad. It looks like someone wanted to draw their own Tigers logo but gave up after a few minutes and started watching some old Doors bootleg VHS tapes.

(If you are interested in obtaining a card featured here, please send me an e-mail. If you have a card you would like to nominate for Airbrushed Fridays, please get in touch as well. I will require that I am able to see the card in person, either on loan or as a donation, so that I can examine the card and experience it in all its cruddiness.)

Airbrushed Fridays: Contest!

This week's airbrushed wonder comes highly recommended from reader Scott once again. I honestly don't know how I've overlooked this card up until this point. Since this has left me nearly speechless, I thought I'd open up this forum to you, the reader.

As you may well know, each week I ask myself and answer the following questions: Why did Topps airbrush [Player]'s photo? What's wrong with this picture, anyway?

Your mission is to answer those questions in the most creative, hilarious, informative and/or interesting way possible. Whoever leaves a comment with the "best" answers will be the proud recipient of a prize that I have yet to determine. You can expect it to contain a healthy stack of baseball cards from the winner's favorite team as well as a memorabilia-related card from the winner's favorite team or player. (I reserve the right, of course, to not attempt to deliver a jersey card of a player that retired before I was born. Likewise, you may be out of luck if you request someone who spent 15 years at AAA or if you say "Stephen Strasburg" at any point.)

Here are two disclaimers: One, obviously no amount of math, sabrmetrics or spoonful of liquid sorcery will be able to produce an objective winner. I will, however, consult with my girlfriend Erin for input during the judging process. Secondly, any attempt to bribe me with baseball cards will not factor into my decision whatsoever... although I certainly won't turn any spare Cardinals away.

I will be out of town for the duration of the weekend, so I am setting a deadline of 9:00 PM PDT on Sunday night, June 20th. Any entries received after the deadline will not eligible for anything but possible ridicule.