We are three days away from Opening Day! This is not a drill. On Sunday evening, the Texas Rangers battle the remnants of the Houston Astros, American League style. Those festivities (?) then give way to a nearly full slate of MLB action on Monday, like Abner Doubleday (or whatever British dude actually invented the game) intended. I am taking the day off from work just to geek out on sportsgames all day and I suggest you do the same. Wait, your boss isn't cool with it? Fake an illness or injury! Wait, you're unemployed/going to college/living in your mom's basement? Just pretend it's dark outside and crack open some cold ones! Peanuts! Caramel-coated popcorn and peanuts! Disregard any interest in ever returning! Bases Ball!
Who is this week's victim, and why do we care? Tommy Hanson is a former Next Big Thing who is teetering dangerously close to Shoulda Coulda Woulda Been territory. He had a rough season last year and could be suffering from some sort of ailment that affects most pitchers at some point in their careers.
Why is this a thing? Hanson was traded in the offseason to the Angels for one time closer Jordan Walden. He was the reliever the Angels were all buzzed up about until Ernesto Frieri passed him up, and both pitchers probably needed a change of scenery. And as usual, the Topps Opening Day set once again serves as a breeding ground for Photoshopped masterpieces. Oh Adobe, is there anything you can't do?
Airbrushed Fridays is a weekly feature as the name seems to imply. If you know of a card with an altered photograph that you'd like to see featured, please contact me. You probably won't win anything other than a hyperlink and some defecated coffee, but you never know!